where am i from again
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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