4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Randomize