She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize