He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize