I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
