2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize