At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
