I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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