two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
