Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Randomize
