she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
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