dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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