we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
