I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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