i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
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