I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
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