I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
