I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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