Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
