i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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