This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
