the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Randomize
