I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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