Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
