I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
