Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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