Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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