4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
