You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
My Higher Power is John Stamos
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
party gras won. party gras always wins.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize
