the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
