i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Even the bartender felt bad for me
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
