when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
wanna go halves on a baby?
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
