can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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