But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
