I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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