I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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