It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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