I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I understand Curling. That high.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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