when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
