You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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