i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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