I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
You pole danced in your parka.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
