if you like me you must not know who I am
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize