you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Dicks are not precious.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
