her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
