Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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