my shit smells like andre
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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