i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
we should paint friendship bongs
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