I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
youre lurking in front of me
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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