Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
