your parents love me but you hate me
I heard we made out
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I need to calm my uterus...
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
